Useful vs. Fruitful

I have recognized in myself a strong desire over the years to be useful.  I am not talking about being productive....that is good and is much more objective.

What I am referring to is that deep seeded desire to do the thing (usually career based although I could certainly see a role like being a stay at home mom or dad, husband or wife falling into this category as well) that you place most value upon.  This becomes the paramount goal of life.

It is a subjective thing which probably varies from person to person and is also fluid, morphing and "evolving" withing a persons own mind and heart.

For me, this started off as missions I think, and then grew and changed over time as I grew and changed over time.  For me now (and it has been true for some years), I see counseling as the most useful thing that I can do.

I'm sure most of you, except possibly those who know my story well and can see where I am heading, are curious to see where I am going with this and how I could possibly see something wrong with a desire to be useful.  

Here is the problem...

Usefulness can become idolatry.  We find something as we grow and develop into adults which holds a value that is very deep in our constructs.  This thing becomes a treasure.  Then our hearts and own self-worth become so inseparable to it that unknowingly we begin to define ourselves by it.  If we do well in our usefulness then we are successful and happy.  If we do not do we well, if we fail to be useful, then we have failed as an individual and become discouraged, sad, depressed, etc. 

Here is the Good news...

We serve a God who is both Sovereign and FULL of grace, unlike our idols.  In the economy of God's providence He is the one who is working out all things according to the counsel of His own will.  He is the one who has defined usefulness to us.  Our only concern needs be "work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God working in you both to will and to work for His good pleasure" Phil. 2:12-13.  

I have had to learn that whether I am a Missionary, Pastor, Teacher, Counselor or Insurance Salesman that my identity can only be found in the cosmic usefulness of Christ.  Because of that, I am called to to do one thing.  Abide in Jesus and bear fruit....wherever He has me.  "You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide" John 15:16

If you are weary from the work of serving your idol of usefulness, turn to the nail pierced hands of Jesus who has done the useful work for you....his yolk is easy and burden light.  Abide and bear fruit, that is what your Savior calls you to.