The smallest of approximations

If you're anything like me, you have found yourself in this perplexing scenario.

From time to time I find myself in a minor depression, feeling blue or whatever you want to call it.  The inevitable next step is typically self pity and the downward spiral continues...it can become quite severe.

God has given me some helpful insight to halt the spiral and recover more quickly before the blues get worse.  I have noticed, and seen this in others as well, that 80% of the time I can trace these feelings back to a single event.  It usually is somewhat significant, but not life shattering, and I simply failed to deal with it in a healthy way...I usually have failed to go through the ordeal in faith.

From then on it seems like the smallest things exponentially compound the feelings which stem from this one issue.  The kids are tough to manage....down I go, I start thinking how much further I would like to be in my career...down I go, I start thinking about my sinfulness and how I could be a better husband, father, worker...down I go.

Next thing I know I am in a full on funk, usually several days removed from the original ordeal that in itself was not incredibly significant, but by the smallest of approximations my life has been affected in an incredibly disproportionate way.


But praise be to God!!!!


I find it to be a glorious truth that our sanctification occurs in the same exact way!  I am so prone to look at the enormous amount of growth in sanctification that I so want to see take place in my life, it can truly be paralyzing to any Christian...


Then I read 2 Corinthians 3:18, 4:7 and see that if I will set my eyes on Jesus, if I will abide in Him, then He tells me that I will be made into His image from "one degree of glory to the next!" By the smallest approximations as I walk through my life, if I will set my gaze on Him in faith, He will carry out the upward spiral of sanctification.


What a promise to know the growth in grace we have in abiding.  It is also good to remember that while certain depressions are mush more complicated and severe, so often our funks and the blues are the result of a single event that has spiraled out of proportion and can be traced back to and overcome by readdressing it  in faith.

Useful vs. Fruitful

I have recognized in myself a strong desire over the years to be useful.  I am not talking about being productive....that is good and is much more objective.

What I am referring to is that deep seeded desire to do the thing (usually career based although I could certainly see a role like being a stay at home mom or dad, husband or wife falling into this category as well) that you place most value upon.  This becomes the paramount goal of life.

It is a subjective thing which probably varies from person to person and is also fluid, morphing and "evolving" withing a persons own mind and heart.

For me, this started off as missions I think, and then grew and changed over time as I grew and changed over time.  For me now (and it has been true for some years), I see counseling as the most useful thing that I can do.

I'm sure most of you, except possibly those who know my story well and can see where I am heading, are curious to see where I am going with this and how I could possibly see something wrong with a desire to be useful.  

Here is the problem...

Usefulness can become idolatry.  We find something as we grow and develop into adults which holds a value that is very deep in our constructs.  This thing becomes a treasure.  Then our hearts and own self-worth become so inseparable to it that unknowingly we begin to define ourselves by it.  If we do well in our usefulness then we are successful and happy.  If we do not do we well, if we fail to be useful, then we have failed as an individual and become discouraged, sad, depressed, etc. 

Here is the Good news...

We serve a God who is both Sovereign and FULL of grace, unlike our idols.  In the economy of God's providence He is the one who is working out all things according to the counsel of His own will.  He is the one who has defined usefulness to us.  Our only concern needs be "work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God working in you both to will and to work for His good pleasure" Phil. 2:12-13.  

I have had to learn that whether I am a Missionary, Pastor, Teacher, Counselor or Insurance Salesman that my identity can only be found in the cosmic usefulness of Christ.  Because of that, I am called to to do one thing.  Abide in Jesus and bear fruit....wherever He has me.  "You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide" John 15:16

If you are weary from the work of serving your idol of usefulness, turn to the nail pierced hands of Jesus who has done the useful work for you....his yolk is easy and burden light.  Abide and bear fruit, that is what your Savior calls you to.